The attitude of gratitude is to be aware of the good that happens to us in life.
It’s easy to forget where we came from and the people who helped us to get where we are.
In general, we have very poor memory when it comes to remembering those who helped us in life and also WE ASSUME THAT WE DESERVE ALL.
Being grateful means recognizing the good that happens in life, but it is not easy to feel gratitude, especially when we are trying to achieve goals in a hurry. It is essential to take a break, head out of the hole and see that we are surrounded by people who do so much for us.
We take for granted what we have. As if life were a company which hired us and was required to maintain our benefits or gifts.
According to author David Fischman, the formula of gratitude is:
A more humility, we have a greater sense that we do not deserve ALL.
In greater humility, we are not so important and nor do we expect a lot from others.
In contrast, we value the small gestures of kindness.
Furthermore, a greater awareness of the gifts that life gives us, the greater the sense of gratitude.
Few people think that being alive, healthy, with many capabilities or that our family does not have a major problem is a gift. We just assume that we deserve.
People with disabilities, like Helen Keller, help us to remember that being healthy is a gift. She confesses:
“I have often thought it would be a blessing from above that every human being, during adulthood, went blind and deaf for a few days. Darkness would make him appreciate the treasure of the view and the silence would teach him to enjoy the sound.
I imagined what I would do if I was given that gift for three days only … Oh, the things I would see if I was given the gift of sight for only three days …!
As I am blind, want to give an advice to which they are not: enjoy your eyes as if tomorrow you were to run out of them, and do the same with everything you have. “
Each day we have life, health, and welfare of our family is a gift to be thankful.
Thank the person who helped you get the position you are currently in the course of your life. He could be your father, your mother, your brother, sister, a friend, a stranger who passed through your life and gave you hand for you to move on.
I suggest you do this exercise for happiness:
Reflect on the day happened and think about an event or situation that you feel grateful. Remember the fact. What happened? What gift did you receive? To who should be grateful?
Let the feeling of gratitude invades your mind and enjoy it (Adapted from Emmons 2008:11)
Practicing this exercise will fill us with happiness. Robert Emmons is one of the leading researchers on gratitude. In their study had a group of people take gratitude journals, writing about what they were thankful. Another control group will play write about other topics. Those who followed the gratitude journal felt happier, had fewer symptoms of illness and felt more satisfied with their lives as a whole.
In another similar study, it was shown that people who wrote about gratitude were 25 percent happier than the control group. The people who showed gratitude were more willing to help and serve others in comparison with the control group.
There are several reasons why gratitude helps us to be happier and the following three causes could be the most significant:
First, it reduces the phenomenon of adaptation. Being thankful we do not get used to what we have. In contrast, to feel gratitude, we become aware of our fortunes and the gifts that life gives us.
Second, be grateful focuses our attention on what we have and not what others have, avoiding envy and negative social comparisons. When we appreciate, we are focusing our attention on the good that happens to us in life. Focusing on the good brings us positive emotions in our lives.
And thirdly, feel gratitude makes us perceive a world of good and help us pay attention to the people around us. It helps us feel loved and appreciated by others and the divine.
EXPRESSING ITS GRATITUDE TO THE PROBLEMS
Taking a class of Personal Enrichment in Los Angeles, California, I heard that in the Chinese language, the synonym of the word “problem” is the word “opportunity”.
And I think the problems will always be in our lives. However it is best to call the problem a challenge. We must learn to overcome that challenge comes in our life and grow as a human being. After overcoming that problem or challenge, you feel so great about yourself and the following problems or challenges will be easier to handle.
I do not know if you noticed that when one is a child, and for some reason was sick with fever. And after overcoming the bad time, the child literally grew in stature one, two or three centimeters. Notice that with a child in your family and verify. When you are an adult, when faced with a problem or challenge, is like fever in children. After overcoming that problem or challenge, you grow as a human being; you become a more mature human being and feel like a superhero. I can guarantee it.
Exercise of reflection:
Think about a difficult issue at this time and have it worried, afraid, anger or frustration. Now, mentally, thanks for the difficulty you are experiencing.
Give thanks to life or God for the difficulties being experienced. Try to see how it’s growing, to face this problem. What are you learning? Perhaps you are learning patience, tolerance, understanding, tenacity or another positive feature. Stay a moment feeling gratitude for this problem that life presents.
Those who developed the previous exercise of reflection have become aware of the benefits. When we thank life or God for a problem, we take control of it. It leaves a feeling that if we can handle and also everything is happening to us we will benefit in the future. It is an excellent stress management strategy and helps us see the positive side of problems.
Exercise of gratitude:
Think of someone close to you whom you have not had a chance to give thanks for what he did for you. It may be a family member, a friend or a person who disinterestedly helped.
Write in a notebook a letter of thanks for this individual. Be generous and grateful. Perhaps this person has not done everything right; however you should focus on the positive aspects of support. Stop reading and do the exercise.
This exercise is one of the most important and I strongly suggest you do. Most people, who do this exercise, loose and stir tears remembering everything you have done for them. Some thank people who have died and wonder: Why did not I do this before?
Why not tell her how much she was grateful? Others realize just when they write a letter of thanks that have been helped or who have given gifts that were not really aware.
Please, do the exercise and I assure you will be very happy. Doing this exercise will allow you to find the treasure of gratitude, a treasure that, the more you delivery the more it grows inside you and makes it happier.
If you know someone who needs this information, please pass the word.